DIY Series- At Home Relaxer

Don’t call it a come back..!

Hello everyone! Yes it has been over a month since I’ve posted… which is a big no no since I just started… but my best friend got married in Jamaica and I just got back on track. So, now we are here, and this is going to be the first in the DIY series of post here on Kitchen Beauticians.

Please let me make this disclaimer first. I am not a licensed stylist. Any tips given on this blog are tips that have been proven to work for me, and you take these suggestions at your own risks.

Now that I’ve covered my butt, lol, let’s get down to it. The first series I am touching upon is relaxed hair. Yes, I am natural, but not everyone is, and that’s fine. I am not Sistah Souljah, advocating for everyone to embrace their curls and leave the oppressive white devil view beauty in its dust. I would never… cause my hair is straight 75% of the time. I DO believe however, no matter what, your hair should be healthy and you should look you best and know what’s right for you. I was relaxed from 13yrs old to 25.

Healthy Relaxed Hair…2009

During that time, I went natural 3 times… My last official perm was October of 2009. Before then I was a Do It Yourself-er. My hair is weird and hair dressers (whether Dominican, black, or white), could never do my hair to my best ability. I spent hours researching (instead of studying) and perfected for me the healthiest routine when relaxing. 

Here are the fundamentals, and you can tweak it as you go along to your own preference.

Step 1- Pre-treat (part 1)

Most people thing the relaxing process starts when you put that creamy crack to your head . Oh no honey. You NEED to prepare your hair for what’s about to happen. Imagine relaxing your hair like a marathon. You wouldn’t run one without preparing first right? Right! Your body would go into shock. Your hair will do the same. Do a protein treatment a few days (I usually did mine 2 days before hand, but you can do yours the wash right before your relaxer if you aren’t a frequent washer like I was). That could be an Aphogee 2 step protein, or an Aubrey’s Organics shampoo/Conditioner/leave in treatment (these reviews will be coming soon). They help strengthen your hair so that way its ready for what’s about to happen.

Step 2- Pick the RIGHT relaxer for your hair

Do not just get any ole relaxer because you see Keisha Cole on the front. No. Please don’t. Know your hair and what it needs. First off, there are two types of relaxers… Lye and No lye

Lye- The main, active ingredient in a lye-based relaxer is sodium hydroxide. The pH level is higher in a lye relaxer than a no-lye relaxer (approximately 12-14 for lye, 9-11 for no-lye, whereas your hair should generally have a pH of around 4-5). The PH being stronger means its quickers to work. However, its also quicker to burn. So if you know you hair has a peoblem “taking” a perm, Lye’s might be the best option for you since it wont sit on your head and cause damage by being there too long. However, these tend to rinse cleanly and quickly with a good neutralizing shampoo follow-up.

No- Lye- The main, active ingredient in a no-lye based relaxer is calcium hydroxide or guanidine hydroxide. Although the pH level of a no-lye relaxer is typically lower than a lye-based one, no-lye relaxers are often associated with dryer hair due to potential calcium buildup. These are better for someone with a more sensitive scalp. However, there is still the potential to get burned and cause damage. Because of the lower pH sometimes make the mistake of leaving a no-lye relaxer on the hair for too long, leading to dry, dull hair due to over-processing. This can be fixed by using clarifying shampoo (or any clarifying method if you are on a no shampoo routine) once a month or so to remove calcium deposits and the dulling effects. NO-LYES ARE USUALLY THE RELAXERS OF CHOICE FOR PEOPLE DOING THEIR HAIR AT HOME SINCE THE PROCESS TIME IS SLOWER AND THEY HAVE TIME TO DO THEIR WHOLE HEAD.

Another crucial factor is picking the proper strength in a relaxer. Most Lyes come in Mild, Regular, and Extra Strength. No-Lyes usually come in the form of Regular and Extra Strength. Again, this is a matter of knowing your hair. Many people use the wrong strength. And that doesn’t just include using to high, it can also mean too low. You would feel it’s safer to get a lower strength, because you don’t want to run the risk of over-processing and or burning, and if it doesn’t work within the recommended time, just keep it in a little longer right? WRONG. Going over the time whether your hair has “took” or not is still damaging. General rule of thumb, if your hair is considered fine (the actual strand is thinner than a sharpened pencil point), stick with regular. If your hair is coarse (same size or thicker than a sharpened pencil point), go for the extra strength. Mils should be used on Color Treated hair or if you don't want your hair bone straight. 

Brand wise, that is preference. I used to use Mizani ButterBlends as my lye, or Precise/Affirm as my no lye. (I preferred Affirm no-lye since I was doing it at home).

Step 3- Pre-treat (part 2)

The second pre-treat starts right as your about to perm. We all know to “base your scalp” by putting a petroleum like protectant as to not burn your skin. However, there is an additional precaution to take. If this isn’t your first perm, you should be covering previously relaxed hair with a oil based protectant. One of the main things you learn about touch-ups is that you should no overlap on to previously relaxed hair. As a DIY-er that’s not always the easiest. This helps to give you a little lee-way and room for error. Also, this helps protect strand when you rinse your hair. There is clearly relaxer in that water that is now running down the rest of your hair. Just because water is added doesn’t mean it’s still not a chemical. Especially if the relaxer you used was lye. Keep your hair covered.

Step 4- Relax!

Begin by sectioning off hair into 4 parts. Start from the part closest to the crown (middle of your head) for each part. This tends to be the longest to take the perm, and needs a bit more time. Plus, the halo/edges/hairline areas tends to be the weakest so putting relaxer on there first is a recipe for breakage. Each section as you apply the perm should not be too thin as it will take you longer to apply, but shouldn’t be too thick as to miss parts. The general idea is about a quart inch thick. If you can, save your hairline for absolute last. But, that’s can be tweaked to your preference.

Follow instruction on box for preparation and timing.

Step 5- Wash

This is very important. You must rinse the relaxer out completely. I suggest going to a beauty supply store, or online and finding one of the color-indicating neutralizing shampoos. That’s the most accurate way to determine if your hair has been rinsed properly. The color changes based off the pH, so if its still out of a comfortable range, the color changes as if to say DANGER!

*Note- If you are adding a rinse, now would be the time. ONLY A RINSE. Please do not use permanent colors during this time. The DIY color will be dropping soon.*

Follow up with a conditioner. Then you must deep condition. Since your hair is really weak after this process, I recommend finding something with a strengthening or protein property. I also used to add a bit of my favorite oil (avocado or black Jamaican castor) to give my hair a boost of moisture. Keep that in for 20 mins (preferably with heat).

Step 6- Drying/Styling

There a few routes you can take with this. I prefer these two as to make sure you hair doesn’t get too much shock:

-Roller setting, then wrapping tight with a bit of oil or serum instead of blow-drying straight.

-Air drying hair until relatively dry (not damp. You can also sit under a hood dryer on low-medium heat until about almost dry), then blow-drying on low to medium heat, and flat ironing.

The less direct heat, the better. Your hair is about as fragile as wet toilet paper right now, even if it doesn’t seem it.

Step 7- Post-treat

Yup, another protein treatment. Your next wash (more than 2-3 days after relaxing), do another treatment like the Pre-treat part1.  As a relaxer, your hair should have protein in its routine regularly. You need to make sure it’s as strong as possible. Also, make sure you don’t use too much direct heat, it damages relaxed hair quicker than hair that isn’t chemically straightened.

I hope this helps ladies! Again if you have any questions, comments, concerns, need clarification or have suggestions, feel free to comment and or email me MsCurlyShe@gmail.com or tweet me at @MsCurlyShe

“A Girl Should be two things, Classy and Fabulous”- Coco Chanel

Keep it Cute Ladies!